


Strawberries and Cream

by Agraulis_vanillae



Category: Undertale (Video Game)
Genre: All bros live in the same house, Barely passable puns, Edgepuff, Food Abuse, M/M, Papyrus - Freeform, Sexual Tension, Strawberries, Underfell Papyrus, Underfell Sans, Underswap Papyrus, brotherly teasing, implied honeymustard
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2018-01-28
Updated: 2018-01-28
Packaged: 2019-03-10 11:53:16
Rating: Mature
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 2,435
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/13501192
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Agraulis_vanillae/pseuds/Agraulis_vanillae
Summary: Papyrus and Edge try to make strawberry desserts, but they keep getting a little... distracted.





	Strawberries and Cream

“IS IT ME OR IS THIS BOWL REALLY ENOUGH FOR THE RECIPE?” Papyrus mused aloud. “I KNOW IT SAID EIGHT CUPS STRAWBERRIES WHICH WE’D MEASURED WHILE THEY WERE WHOLE BUT…”

 

Papyrus and Edge were examining the bowl of crushed strawberries for the strawberry jam recipe. Strawberry juice dripped all over, including down their faces from the force of their assault on the strawberries. Their Undynes had taught them well. Unfortunately, it hadn’t saved them from the inordinate mess that was the tart red fruit being mashed to a pulp.

 

Papyrus hummed and crossed his arms as he read through the cookbook once more, eyebrows furrowed in concentration.

 

Edge watched a bead of strawberry juice drip down Papyrus’s temple and disappear from sight temporarily only to reappear halfway down his jaw. In a huff, he grabbed some paper towels from a nearby roll and flipped the side that wasn’t flecked with strawberry gore under the running water from the kitchen sink. “HOLD STILL-”

 

“OH, THANK YOU! I WAS TRYING TO IGNORE THAT, BUT IT’S REALLY QUITE STICKY-” Papyrus closed one eye reflexively as Edge dabbed near his socket, and then followed the line of strawberry juice down his face. He set the cookbook back down, the rest of the instructions unread as Edge stepped a little closer and tilted his head as he examined his sunny double. With uncharacteristic gentleness that he used only with Papyrus, he caught any trails of juice and wiped off whatever strawberry matter clung to his face. Papyrus’s breath caught oddly as the paper towel grazed over his teeth, but otherwise stood patiently still for the examination.

 

Swap strolled through the kitchen to get a bottle of honey from the cabinet, where he stopped to take stock of the situation before shrugging slightly and strolling out, unnoticed.

 

With a slight cough, Edge stepped away. “YOU LOOK… BETTER NOW. WE MAY CONTINUE MAKING JAM.” Neither of them spoke as they crushed more strawberries and got more goop sloshed all over themselves again, rendering Edge’s efforts useless. Edge reread the recipe book again with a frown, taking in the entirety of the instructions. “HEY CREAMPUFF, LOOK AT THIS…”

 

Papyrus read the instructions again, and facepalmed. “WAIT, SO WE ONLY NEEDED FIVE CUPS? WHAT ARE WE GOING TO DO WITH THE OTHER THREE CUPS OF CRUSHED STRAWBERRIES THEN?”   
  
“MAKE SOMETHING ELSE LATER, BUT THE WATER IN THE CANNING POT IS ALREADY BOILING SO WE HAVE TO GET STARTED OR ELSE THE WATER WILL RUN OUT!” Edge pointed out, as the flames were turned up so high underneath the pot that they were licking up the sides of the pot. The pot had scorch marks running up its sides as evidence of what’s happened when Blue accidentally left the pot on to chase after the annoying dog once. 

 

“ON IT!” Quickly, Papyrus poured strawberry matter into the pot, then lemon juice and pectin. “MAYBE WE COULD MAKE STRAWBERRY SHORTCAKE? I KNOW WE HAVE SOME HEAVY CREAM AND FLOUR BUT WE DON’T HAVE THE EGGS TO MAKE SOMETHING LIKE A CUSTARD OR PIE FILLING.” 

 

Edge prepared the sugar to be dumped in as soon as it hit the boiling point, on which he’d taken over the task of stirring the jam while Papyrus rinsed the strawberries juice off the counters. He’d just finished getting the sterilized jars out of the canner when the strawberry jam hit a rolling boil and began flinging the lava-like sugary substance everywhere including Edge’s exposed hands.   
  
“OW FUCK-!” Edge vaulted back momentarily shaking his hand and muttering curses. Just in time to save the project, Papyrus turned off the stove but then pushed his counterpart to the sink.

 

“ARE YOU OKAY?” He guided his hands underneath the stream of cold water, gently removing the rapidly cooling jam so that he could examine the burn. 

 

“TCH. YEAH. IT’S NOTHING THE GREAT AND TERRIBLE PAPYRUS CAN’T HAND-LE!” Edge declared, a tad flustered at the caring touch. 

 

“THAT’S A TERRIBLE PUN.” Papyrus scolded him, and Edge looked at him blankly before it hit him, groaning emphatically.  “OH NO!!! MY TERRIBLE BROTHER MUST BE INFLUENCING ME MORE THAN I REALIZED!!!” 

 

With a slight smile, Papyrus responded, “FORTUNATELY FOR YOU, I WILL STILL AID IN YOUR RECOVERY!”

 

Almost as if summoned, Red had appeared in the kitchen doorway, originally meaning to fish out mustard from the fridge door but stopping at the sight of the taller skeletons. Papyrus had turned to a drawer that they kept specifically for kitchen injuries and the well-used fire extinguishing kit, with Edge still standing next to the sink. He clutched the ledge of the sink tightly for a moment, as he was watching Papyrus’s backside with a faint flush.

 

“AH, HERE IT IS! I’LL TREAT YOUR WOUND WITH THIS SO PLEASE HOLD STILL.” He turned around just as Edge averted his gaze, though the flush remained in place. 

 

Red smirked as his little brother was bandaged up, with his sweeter counterpart none the wiser to the source of Edge’s embarrassment. That wasn’t to say that Papyrus was completely innocent in this exchange, Red noted. He was standing awfully close, his movements stilling as the bandage had been successfully applied, and he was staring up into Edge’s eyes. They both began leaning forward, Papyrus’s eyelights softly hazing as Edge’s expression relaxed.

 

“how  _ berry _ sweet of you papy.” Red spoke up with his smile morphing into a smirk. 

 

Startled out of it, they both moved away to a deceptively platonic distance. If his boss wanted to bang himself, who was he to judge? But Red wouldn’t be doing his duty if he didn’t tease him just a little bit about it. “but i can think of a few other ways you could help boss out, if you catch my drift.” He winked, and delightfully Papyrus cocked his head like a curious puppy.

 

“OH, ARE YOU TALKING ABOUT HEALING MAGIC? I’D BE HAPPY TO LEARN, UNDYNE ISN’T VERY GOOD AT IT SO SHE HASN’T TAUGHT ME ANY YET.” 

 

Edge on the other hand, growled deep in his throat, already well-versed in where this conversation was leading. “DON’T-”

 

“see the boss here’s been dealing with a boner lasting for way longer than twenty-four hours and word is-” Red began only to be predictably interrupted by a mortified Edge.

 

“I SWEAR TO THE STARS I WILL DUST YOU!!!” He grabbed the nearest thing and threw it at Red in a blind rage, the basket of strawberries. Red stepped out of the way of most of the strawberries but once the shower of shiny red fruit fell past him, they’d realized that he actually caught some of the fruit in his hands and was now spinning a strawberry on the tips of his phalanges. 

 

“-word is, that’s not good for your health. watch closely papy, this is how you can help with that.” He’d wrapped his tongue suggestively around the tip of the strawberry, moaning deeply from the bottom of his throat and widening his mouth to take in the strawberry completely. He’d only just began to deepthroat the strawberry when Papy had already averted his gaze, face blazing, and realized that the strawberries they were using were now squashed against the wall and floor.

 

“EDGE WE CAN’T MAKE STRAWBERRY SHORTCAKE NOW…” He mentioned hesitantly. Edge went from glowering at Red making more obnoxiously obscene noises in his sloppy makeout with the previously innocent fruit to snatching the basket that had been cast aside in his rage.

 

“GREAT, GUESS WE’LL HAVE TO GET MORE!” Edge seized Papyrus’s hand and dragged him passed Red with a none too gentle shove. “GET OUT OF THE WAY IMPUDENT IMP!”

 

“WE AREN’T DONE WITH THE JAM THOUGH?!!” Papyrus’s voice faded as he allowed himself to be dragged away. “PLUS WE DIDN’T REALLY NEED TO MAKE STRAWBERRY SHORTCAKE…”

 

Red chuckled to himself, and let his leer relax into a fond smile. As much as he teased, it sure was cute seeing those two get along so well.

 

“what are you doing?” Swap’s voice sounded from behind Red, before the lanky skeleton made another go at the honey supply. Red raised his eyebrows at the newcomer to the scene, who stopped before him and uncapped the bottle. In reply, Red bit into the strawberry so that is squelched noisily between his teeth with juice running down to his chin, and began tonguing the gaping hole in the fruit. 

 

“real mature dude.”

 

~

 

Along the way back to the strawberry fields, Edge felt Papyrus’s hand inch into his free hand, and offhandedly he squeezed back. Papyrus glanced up to his face quickly, and beamed, a brilliant flush lighting up his face. Unable to maintain his composure under such a open display of happiness, Edge quietly ‘hmph’ed to himself and cast his gaze back onto the road. It was a rare moment of silence between the two, before Papyrus broke it by pointing out a vintage model sports car that passed them on the road.

 

Ticked off, Edge began racing it. Who says he’s a slow driver?! It better not be this guy!!! Papyrus yelped at the speed the two began picking up, and then began cheering. It turned into such a big thing between the two, that they overshot the exit off the road to the strawberry fields and had to double back as soon as they lost track of the other driver. 

 

The ensuing conversation lasted up into driving to the strawberry fields, a set of baskets next to a dirt driveway. The sign rattled off prices of strawberries at different weights, and directions where to pay. The farm was ran by a monster that had faith that customers would abide by the honor system.

 

They were carefully stepping through the rows of strawberries when Papyrus asked, “EDGE, WHAT DID RED MEAN WHEN HE SAID I COULD HELP YOU SOMEHOW?”

 

Caught off guard, Edge’s entire body stiffened and he growled, “NEVER SPEAK OF THAT VULGAR DISPLAY!!! I SWEAR I’M GOING TO KILL THAT STUNTED LITTLE INTERNET TROLL!”

 

“AH, DON’T DO THAT! I’M SURE HE MEANS WELL, AS I WOULD LIKE TO HELP!” Papyrus objected, ending the violent fantasy mid-tantrum. Edge looked at him, wide eyed.

 

“D-DON’T SAY THAT!” He demanded uneasily, convinced that Papyrus didn’t know what he was getting himself into. Papyrus for his part, squeezed his hand with another bright smile before letting him go, kneeling down to pick strawberries. Edge thought that was the end of it, and with a low sigh of relief, he went along the rows as well. The two made short work of the task, keeping an eye out for any blemishes they found in the fruit, and working together not to go over the same row twice. They had much the same standards after all- which were quite high! 

 

They found the most furthest from the row, where they hadn’t ventured as far in yet on the previous expedition. The fruit was the ripest, reddest, and largest too as they grew further from the road. “OH, THESE LOOK SO GOOD!” Papyrus declared, kneeling into the soil to pick at a particularly fecund plant. The fruit was large enough that Papyrus had no doubts that they would’ve been sold dipped in chocolate if it was near Valentine’s day. “MAYBE IT WOULDN’T HURT TO EAT JUST ONE…”

 

“NOT BEFORE DINNERTIME! WE JUST GOT THE INGREDIENTS FOR SPAGHETTI CARBONARA, REMEMBER?” Edge scolded. 

 

“IT TAKES MORE THAN ONE MEASLY STRAWBERRY TO FOIL THE APPETITE AS GREAT AS I!” Papyrus bit in, taking obvious pleasure in the juice dripping down his mouth. Edge snorted, looking away only for his gaze to be drawn back in at the luscious shade of red that was soon obscured by Papyrus’s tongue delicately lapping at the fruit.

 

“RIGHT, BUT THEN ONE TURNS INTO TWO, AND THEN THREE, AND THEN…” Edge’s voice came out throaty, but he couldn’t shove his words back into his skull. He cleared his throat and projected with more force. “... AND THEN IT’S FIVE, THEN TEN! YOU’VE SEEN BLUE GORGE ON THOSE BLACKBERRIES, HE GAVE HIMSELF A STOMACHACHE!”

 

Papyrus gave him a surprisingly sly look. “NYEH HEH HEH! OBVIOUSLY IT’S NOT THE NUMBER THAT MATTERS, BUT HOW YOU EAT THEM.”

 

He slowly bit into the strawberry once more, finishing it off in such a way that made Edge feel uncomfortable about the turn his thoughts were taking. “Y-YES WELL! HOW WE SHOULD EAT THEM SHOULD BE ON STRAWBERRY SHORTCAKE WITH DINNER TONIGHT!”

 

Papyrus stepped over the row of strawberries that separated them, standing close to him in the narrow walking space to avoid stepping on the overgrowth from the plants. “DO YOU PROMISE? CAN WE HAVE IT WITH LOTS OF HOMEMADE WHIP CREAM?”

 

He grabbed Edge’s hands, and clasped them to his chest. Edge’s magic was pounding so hard through his soul it almost hurt with the intensity. He squeezed Papyrus’s hands in return, then slowly extracted them so that he could cup his cheekbones. “IF THAT’S WHAT YOU WISH FOR, I PROMISE.”

 

“STRAWBERRIES AND CREAM SOUNDS DELICIOUS. PERHAPS I’LL HOLD OFF UNTIL DINNER AFTER ALL.” Papyrus murmured, leaning forward. His breath was warm on Edge’s face, and smelled sweet from the fruit.

 

“I THINK SO TOO…” Edge closed the distance with a quick little peck over Papyrus’s teeth and then abashedly turned away, suddenly letting Papyrus go. “THAT IS, IF YOU DON’T MIND GOING TO THE GROCERY STORE AGAIN TO GET THE EXTRA CREAM-”

 

In turn, Papyrus threw his arms around his neck and silenced him with a much longer, lingering kiss. Edge forgot what he was about to say as Papyrus’s body seemed to meld perfectly against his, and simply wrapped his arms around the other skeletons shoulders. The strawberry basket lay forgotten on the dark loamy soil, with only the sounds of the wind and distant traffic suggesting that there was a world beyond themselves.

~

“looks like you owe me 5g, red.” 

Red sighed, and scratched the cracks running across his eye socket. “aw, i really thought they were going to do it right there.”

Swap was on his stomach with binoculars, only somewhat hidden on the forest floor beyond the fields. “seriously, why is your first assumption that their first time was going to be in the car?”

“hey, it’s what i’d do.” He shrugged. “not everyone’s as repressed as you are.”

“you’re just saying that because i wouldn’t let you try to get me drunk through my asshole.”

“no, _ that _ was for science.” Red rebutted. “i’m saying that because you didn’t want to do it in mall restroom while blue sat on sans-ta’s lap.”

“who would?!!”

**Author's Note:**

> Brothers are so nosy, aren't they?  
> On a different note, I'd written half of this a while ago and then hadn't finished it so I made a point to finish this alongside faetale around New Year's. This is kind of the spiritual sequel to Oranges And Cream, and in the spirit of that there will be a sequel to this! That's the good news. The bad news? I have no idea when I'll write the next oneshot. But I figured since I ended this on the note of teasing and sexual tension, there probably ought to be a last Explicit oneshot to top off what's turning out to be a 3 chapter fic in its own right.  
> If you enjoyed or want to stay in the loop when the next part is coming out, you can follow me on Tumblr! Otherwise, just leave me a comment or a kudos.I love those~  
> https://agraulisvanillae.tumblr.com/


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